Title: How We Met Barney
Disclaimer: I don't own the show or the characters.
Summary: Ted tells the tale and leave his kids to wonder: Who's Barney?  Story found here on LJ and on fanfiction.
Beta: Roland44
A/N: I’m finding this to be much longer than I originally anticipated 0_o When I thought it up it was supposed to be like 6 parts. Now... So I had to add in a few extra parts. Sorry about the lack of update lately; I keep thinking of more uh... stuff. Plus I’ve been busy. Yeah no excuse. Sorry again, more tomorrow.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

PART 6

 

Robin didn’t love Ted. At least... not anymore; not since that time they dated – back in 2006. Those feelings never quite go away. That was normal, wasn’t it? He was the first guy she really...

They do change though. They morph, from love to... to something else. Ted was her friend. He held a piece of her heart, sure, and she’d never get to forget that. But she wasn’t in love with him. She hadn’t for a long time. She didn’t dream of him; she didn’t spend her few, estranged moments of leisure thinking of things to do with him, thinking of things she would say, thinking of what he would say, thinking of what he was doing... thinking of him.

Not Ted. No, she didn’t love him. She was in love with his best friend – as he so often claimed – and he seemed really upset that she was spending so much time taking care of the widow and his kids.

“Don’t you mean why don’t I join you and Ted to dinner?” he grumbled in response.

She had asked him if they should – could – take Ted out to dinner with them. He had been getting better, although he still spent a lot of time ... mourning. Things were better.

“What?” she asked hurt. She heard him sigh and walk to the bathroom where she was combing her hair.

He came in, smiled comfortably, and hugged her from behind – wrapping his arms around her and letting his head gently rest on her shoulder.

“Nothing,” he whispered sweetly, watching for her wounded expression to fade. “I just haven’t seen you in a while.” She put her brush down. “Plus I’ll be going away on that business trip in a few weeks.”

She turned around, holding onto him, “Well they do need you to do.. stuff?”

“Please,” he smirked. “Nice try – not the most creative...”

“Yeah, I kind of gave up on figuring out what it is back in 2012,” she edge closer, burying her face in his dress shirt. For a moment they were both quiet, hugging one another, each trying to memorize the others’ scent. “Ted’ll get back on his feet...” Robin finally said. 

“Yeah...” He tightened his hold. “He will.”

 

--

 

 

“They don’t know anything, do they?” Barney sat down in Marshall and Lily’s armchair and rubbed his forehead. “Ted’s never talked about me? Like, seriously, never?” 

“Well, that’s not true,” Marshall said trying to explain. “Ted’s been telling them stories from the old days, about how he met their mom. He’s been going on about you and Lily and I and... well, you know, the whole gang really.”

“Right, the whole gang...”

“And,” Lily jumped in, “our kids have met you and talked about you to them, sometimes...” She turned to Marshall and added, “Right?”

“Oh, sure! They love you; they go crazy for Uncle Barney... BarnBarn...”

“Huh?”

“The point is,” Lily explained, “they haven’t seen you since they were toddlers, Linda wasn’t even in kindergarten when... when you stopped seeing them.”

“That wasn’t my fault!”

“I know,” Marshall reassured him, “we know, it wasn’t Barney. But you gotta understand, it wasn’t theirs either.”

 

--

 

Robin entered Ted’s house, quietly closing the door. She made her way to the kitchen, there was a bottle of whisky there. She took shaky breaths, she wasn’t gonna cry, if she kept repeating that maybe it would become true.

“Ted!” She said surprised, he was sitting at the table, downing another drink, the bottle of whisky at his elbow. “I uh... I didn’t think you... uhh...” Ted looked her over for a few seconds before getting up. He pulled another glass out from the cupboard and put it on the table, sitting back down he poured the whisky.

“Here,” he edge the cup towards her and drank his own. It was the least he could do...

 

--

 

Linda, sitting next to her newly discovered Uncle and her younger brother, waited impatiently for someone to break the silence. David twisted his head, looking around the apartment. It was ... well it was neat.

“So... what do you do for a living?” David tried.

“Please,” he scoffed; it was pretty much a reflex.

David smiled madly and had a few chuckles escape. He got, in return, a raised eyebrow from Linda and Barney. Marshall and Lily glanced his way but looked at each other worriedly.

“Sorry, I didn’t think you’d actually say it.”

Linda mentally scolded him, Barney’s eyes grew a little and he smiled back to David.

 

--

 

“Robin, are you sure?” Lily asked carrying a few canvas boxes inside.

“Yes!” Robin answered with frustration. She wasn’t mad at Lily, she was just mad. The past few months had been hell. It all happened so fast... Ted... Barney...

...Barney.

He wasn’t taking her calls or was too busy to... either way, she didn’t blame him. She just wished... the least he could do was talk to her, right?

But it seemed he didn’t want to have anything to do with her. He hated her. And she couldn’t blame him for it. In fact, she had thoughts on it herself.

As long as she was here, though, she might as well do some good. 

So she moved in with Ted. She got her own room, helped with the kids and stuff, and she was out of town most of the time, anyways.

It was a good plan.

 

--

 

Barney lay back next to her, hormones rushing – panting for breath. 

“I saw the kids today.”

“Lily and Marshall’s? She replied with a grin, turning around so that her upper body lay on top of his, she kissed his pecs working up to his neck.

“No...” he chuckled when she found a tickle spot. “Ted’s.”

“Ted?” She stopped abruptly. “I thought you two weren’t speaking?”

“Hmm, we’re not,” he admitted.

“Then?...” She raised an eyebrow.

“Then...” He ran his fingers down her arm, down the side of her back, down...

“Barney!” They giggled while she playfully found his hand under their covers. 

She turned, lying on her side, and brought his hand up and began examining it in her own, tracing the lines in his palm and interlocking her own fingers with his. They both watched thoughtfully, enjoying each other’s company, enjoying the silence.

“Didn’t he marry your ex?” She asked without looking at him.

“Yeah...”

 

--

 

“Where is she?” Barney marched in as soon as Lily opened the door.

“Barney?” She said completely surprised at his appearance, no one had heard of him in a month and a half.

“Yeah, hi Lily.” He didn’t wait for an answer. “Where is she?!” He walked from room to room, shouting his question back to Lily.

“Uncle Barney?” A small voice was heard, stopping the man in his tracks.

“Oh, hey Penny,” Barney answered politely. “Do you know where your Aunt Robin is?” 

“NO!” Lily’s eyes grew as soon as she heard the question, she was standing behind Barney who had bent down to talk to his niece. Both he and Penny turned to Lily confused by her outburst. “I mean... Penelope, why don’t you go find your daddy?”

“Daddy’s at work!” She cleverly responded.

“Uh, well go give him a call, k?”

“But it’s not 12 o’clock yet.”

“He won’t mind,” Lily persisted, a plastered ‘mommy’ smile on. Barney stood up, knowing there would be bad news.

“Okey-Dokey. See ya later, Uncle Barney,” she said before strolling to the phone in the living room.

When she had turned the corner Lily pointed Barney towards her bedroom and, once the two were inside, she closed the door.